Your Rights as a Parent of a Child with a Disability—and How to Assert Them with Your Landlord

Push Back When Housing Policies Clash with Your Child’s Needs

If you’re raising a child with a disability in California and getting services through the Regional Center, you’re not just juggling caregiving and survival—you’re also stuck navigating a housing system that wasn’t built with your situation in mind.

Let’s be clear: landlords don’t get to ignore the law just because your child’s needs are inconvenient for them. And no, you don’t need to file a lawsuit just to get a damn ramp, or a ground floor unit, or a bit of extra time to handle clutter before they slap you with a 3-day notice.

So here’s what you need to know—and how to use it.

The Law Is Actually on Your Side—If You Use It Right

Both federal and California housing laws—including the Fair Housing Act and California’s Fair Employment and Housing Act (FEHA)—say this:

You have the right to request reasonable accommodations from your landlord to help your child live safely and with dignity in your home.

What counts as a “reasonable accommodation”? It’s any change to a rule, policy, or procedure that helps level the playing field for a person with a disability.

Here’s what that can look like in real life:

• Requesting a unit on the first floor because your child can’t safely use stairs.

• Installing child-proofing devices or medical equipment your child needs.

• Asking the landlord to delay eviction hearings when therapy or medical care clashes with court dates.

• Requesting a reserved parking spot closer to your unit.

Bottom line: If the request is connected to the child’s disability and doesn’t cause an “undue burden” to the landlord, they have a legal duty to seriously consider it—and usually, to grant it.

No Legalese Required—But Be Smart About How You Ask

You don’t need to quote statutes or sound like a lawyer. But you do need to be clear, and ideally, keep a paper trail.

✅ Put it in writing. Email, letter, even a text—just keep a copy.

✅ Say what you need and why. One sentence is enough: “Due to my child’s mobility disability, we are requesting to transfer to a ground floor unit.”

✅ Add a support letter if you can. A note from a doctor or your Regional Center service coordinator helps. It doesn’t need to be fancy.

✅ Stay calm. Angry or accusatory language makes it easier for them to dismiss you. Don’t give them an excuse.

What Your Landlord Can’t Do (Even Though Some Still Try)

Let’s talk about the pushback.

Your landlord legally can’t:

• Ignore your request.

• Take weeks to respond.

• Say “no” just because it’s inconvenient.

• Retaliate against you for making the request—like raising rent, starting eviction, or calling code enforcement.

They can deny it only if it creates an undue financial or administrative burden or if it fundamentally changes the nature of the housing service. That’s a high bar. Asking for a ground floor unit or more time to pay rent because your SSI check is delayed? That doesn’t qualify.

If they retaliate? That’s grounds for a discrimination claim under state and federal law. They may be banking on you not knowing that.

Real-Life Examples We See All the Time

• You ask for a two-week extension to clean up because between caregiving, night shifts, and burnout, you’re drowning. That’s a reasonable accommodation.

• You request to defer an eviction hearing because your child’s surgery is scheduled the same week. Also reasonable.

• You need time to pay rent because a Medi-Cal service delay interrupted your child’s support payments. Again—document it and request an extension as an accommodation.

What To Do When They Don’t Listen

If the landlord drags their feet or just flat-out ignores you, here’s your game plan:

1. Send a second written request after 10 days. Politely—but firmly—note that you haven’t received a response.
   
   
   

2. Escalate to help. Contact:
   
   

   • Disability Rights California

   • Fair Housing Foundation

   • Legal Aid Foundation of Los Angeles

   • South LA Tenant Assistance Group (yep, that’s us)
     
     

3. Document everything. Every text, every voicemail, every notice on your door. Keep it organized. You might need it.
   
   

This Isn’t About Special Treatment. It’s About Basic Fairness.

Let’s be brutally honest: The housing system is not designed for families like yours. But the law is one of the few tools you’ve got to level the field—and you need to use it early, clearly, and strategically.

The earlier you assert your rights, the better your odds of keeping your housing stable. That stability is more than paperwork—it’s the foundation for your child’s care.

Don’t wait until the sheriff’s at the door. Get proactive. Get documentation. Get support.

And don’t let anyone treat your child’s needs like they’re optional.